If like me, you are one of the lucky Londoners who have the joy of this daily jostle with your fellow countrymen and loving tourist, you will no doubt have come across a few women sharing the compartment with you but should they be allowed?
A few points to argue why they should not…
1. Inability to use the exit gates Why is it whenever I have a 9am meeting I’m always caught behind the fashionista with a bag that would be more suitable for a weekend trip to Bath than a day trip to the office? Not that I have anything against oversized bags on an already cramped Tube (please sense sarcasm) but it’s more because she always decides to find her Oyster card at the exit gate. But what’s that? You can’t find it? Who would have thought in a bag THAT BIG you’d struggle to find it? More to the point, you’ve just had a thirty minute Tube journey, a further ten minutes on an escalator but never thought these might be the ideal times to find your Oyster card? Don’t panic, I’ll just wait here with the rest of the rush hour traffic as I’ve now missed the start of my meeting…
2. Getting dressed on the Tube As I sit opposite a woman doing her makeup and combing her
matted hair I often ponder what her response would be if I reached into my bag and pulled out a toothbrush and toothpaste and began to brush my nashers. But it isn’t just the pain of watching you apply your eyeliner all over your face, oh no, there is the soaking wet hair to contend with. No doubt you didn’t have time to flick the hair dryer on this morning.
3. Trainers with suits Like crumbs in the butter dish and empty toilet rolls on the dispenser, there cannot be a more annoying pet hate than women who insist on a sexy suit teamed with the latest running trainers. Do you even run? Is the walk that far and do you really save that much time?4. Did I mention oversized bags I think I did but just to echo my point. Why do you need THAT HUGE bag? What the hell do you carry? I can see there is no laptop in it as that sits in ANOTHER bag.
5. The gym back that never leaves your back Is the Tube was packed? Of course it is, its rush hour but yet you have to keep that bag full of products and a gym kit (that has never seen the light of day) nestled on your back throughout this crammed journey. Thank God you haven’t discovered foldaway bikes!
I appreciate men are not much better…or are they???
